A long, long time ago in a land far, far away, a beardy guy with a
Saviour Complex (not me) got all hung up over some disagreement. You
can find the little beardy guy commemorated on those little necklace
things.
Today, we celebrate his death, or, as many would put it, his “passing” (he’s still dead) by eating lots of chocolate eggs.
We call them Easter Eggs because, coincidentally, they are on sale over the same period as the beardy guy died in. How cool is that?
What gift do you give/receive on Gilgamesh Day? There is a Gilgamesh Day…isn’t there?
Anyway, I was thinking at about 0320 hours (in amongst praying for a quick painless death I do think of other things such as how the Vision will react when he gets together again with the Scarlet Witch. I mean, after all the trouble talentless hacks caused and blamed her for -including the Vision’s death (HEY -he’s come back to life just in time for Easter!)- and her father, Magneto, who used to be leader of the Evil Brotherhood of Mutants but then reformed, went on trial and later turned bad again before being a core participant in the X-Men after Patrick Stewart gave up leading them, is not liking the whole Vision-married-the-Scarlet Witch thingy. It’s a bit like Robert DeNiro as the father in that film with Ben Stiller -who starred in Mystery Men which was a really great super hero spoof movie and WILL be recognised as such one day. And how will things go when The Avengers face off against the X-Men in the much over-publicised (EVEN toilet rolls watermarked with “AVX“!) Avengers Versus X-Men because the Scarlet Witch was a member of the X-Men’s enemies The Brotherhood of Mutants but then joined the Avengers so mix-reactions on her part? And The Vision WAS/is married to her so as a member of the Avengers does he side with her or does he…
Now you know why praying for a clean painful death can be a good thing.
Anyway, my thoughts…naked Goth/Punk chicks…my thoughts…Lois Lane -Wonder Woman lesbian affair…my thoughts………………hang on. Need to visit the toilet quickly.
Right. Back now. Where was I…NO! Let’s not go back there Mythbusters is on TV in 14 hours and I want to see it and not break the internet.
Yes. How can we, as comickers, celebrate the death of the British Comics Industry? A chocolate comic is a bit out because it might melt (somewhat like the industry did) but there are too many points against that. Firstly, I (and others I’ve spoken to) have noticed how British comic fans are not just the old familiar bearded tubbies they used to be but are becoming “American Obese.” Of course, not every fan but if you’ve been stuck in a small elevator in record temperatures with three VERY overweight and profusely sweating/smelling comickers and you have to try to stop heaving you’ll know what I mean….
Maybe if that beardy guy had thought about it he might have pigged out and put on lots of weight…even the Romans would have thrown in the towel at trying to raise a 325 man on a cross!!
Anyway, I tend to treat people as people and not what size they are (except in very enclosed spaces)but I do try to warn them that sitting at home playing computer games (what happened to Video games?) and reading comics while overdosing on sugary drinks, cheese burgers and pizza is not going to help you either get laid or enjoy a long life.
Type 2 (Late onset) Diabetes, my friends. It’s the New AIDS. Seriously, I watched this TV programme with health executives and one said “It’s the New AIDS” -well ‘thanks’ for that uncalled stigma to be attached to this. Bad enough they say “Late Onset” -”You’re old and can’t enjoy food or life like you used to!” is how they could label it without changing the meaning.
Wanna know how Bruce Banner feels when he can’t stop changing into the Hulk? One word: “Hypo” (a hip, cool word D-Clubbers use to indicate that they are shitting their pants because their blood sugar level has crashed) -try asking for help at a comic convention:
“I’m Hypo!” responses:
“Don’t you mean “Hyperion”? Where’s your costume?”
“Is he a new DC character post 52?”
“Is he a new Marvel character post…a mess?”
“Wasn’t he one of the cartoon Impossibles?”
I could go on but you get the point?
What the **** is this editorial about?? I know I had a point to make…comics…toilet pap—ah!
Yes, we should set aside 6th June as “Death of the British Comics Industry Day” and we should give each other sheets of toilet paper with, maybe, a matchstick man on? It’s a thought and I think an appropriate one -people giving each other sheets of toilet paper…on..my…birthday. Uh, maybe another day?
And to you “large” comickers: unless you want to attend comic cosplay events as Herbie The Fat Fury, The Human Blimp, Blimp Man, The Blob or some other out-sized comic character, get healthy. Remember: No Man’s Comic Collection Should Outlive Him.
AND NOW FOR A WORD FROM OUR SPONSOR -A CROSS BEARDY MAN DOING A TOTAL SELF PROMOTION!
Note:Yes, I do understand that there are certain medical conditions that affect a persons weight but I’m referring to the “I’ve big bones” folk (there is no such thing!). And, yes, I realise that diabetes is “a bloody serious thing” so the trendy “Some of my best friends are diabetics” folk can go **** off.
Oh, I thinbk the beardy guy was a Mexican named “Jesus”?
****************************************************************************************
Disclaimer:Comic Bits Online and Black Tower Comics & Books would like to point out that the opinions expressed here are those of the individual and in no way reflect the official opinion of CBO or BTCG.
Today, we celebrate his death, or, as many would put it, his “passing” (he’s still dead) by eating lots of chocolate eggs.
We call them Easter Eggs because, coincidentally, they are on sale over the same period as the beardy guy died in. How cool is that?
What gift do you give/receive on Gilgamesh Day? There is a Gilgamesh Day…isn’t there?
Anyway, I was thinking at about 0320 hours (in amongst praying for a quick painless death I do think of other things such as how the Vision will react when he gets together again with the Scarlet Witch. I mean, after all the trouble talentless hacks caused and blamed her for -including the Vision’s death (HEY -he’s come back to life just in time for Easter!)- and her father, Magneto, who used to be leader of the Evil Brotherhood of Mutants but then reformed, went on trial and later turned bad again before being a core participant in the X-Men after Patrick Stewart gave up leading them, is not liking the whole Vision-married-the-Scarlet Witch thingy. It’s a bit like Robert DeNiro as the father in that film with Ben Stiller -who starred in Mystery Men which was a really great super hero spoof movie and WILL be recognised as such one day. And how will things go when The Avengers face off against the X-Men in the much over-publicised (EVEN toilet rolls watermarked with “AVX“!) Avengers Versus X-Men because the Scarlet Witch was a member of the X-Men’s enemies The Brotherhood of Mutants but then joined the Avengers so mix-reactions on her part? And The Vision WAS/is married to her so as a member of the Avengers does he side with her or does he…
Now you know why praying for a clean painful death can be a good thing.
Anyway, my thoughts…
Right. Back now. Where was I…NO! Let’s not go back there Mythbusters is on TV in 14 hours and I want to see it and not break the internet.
Yes. How can we, as comickers, celebrate the death of the British Comics Industry? A chocolate comic is a bit out because it might melt (somewhat like the industry did) but there are too many points against that. Firstly, I (and others I’ve spoken to) have noticed how British comic fans are not just the old familiar bearded tubbies they used to be but are becoming “American Obese.” Of course, not every fan but if you’ve been stuck in a small elevator in record temperatures with three VERY overweight and profusely sweating/smelling comickers and you have to try to stop heaving you’ll know what I mean….
Maybe if that beardy guy had thought about it he might have pigged out and put on lots of weight…even the Romans would have thrown in the towel at trying to raise a 325 man on a cross!!
Anyway, I tend to treat people as people and not what size they are (except in very enclosed spaces)but I do try to warn them that sitting at home playing computer games (what happened to Video games?) and reading comics while overdosing on sugary drinks, cheese burgers and pizza is not going to help you either get laid or enjoy a long life.
Type 2 (Late onset) Diabetes, my friends. It’s the New AIDS. Seriously, I watched this TV programme with health executives and one said “It’s the New AIDS” -well ‘thanks’ for that uncalled stigma to be attached to this. Bad enough they say “Late Onset” -”You’re old and can’t enjoy food or life like you used to!” is how they could label it without changing the meaning.
Wanna know how Bruce Banner feels when he can’t stop changing into the Hulk? One word: “Hypo” (a hip, cool word D-Clubbers use to indicate that they are shitting their pants because their blood sugar level has crashed) -try asking for help at a comic convention:
“I’m Hypo!” responses:
“Don’t you mean “Hyperion”? Where’s your costume?”
“Is he a new DC character post 52?”
“Is he a new Marvel character post…a mess?”
“Wasn’t he one of the cartoon Impossibles?”
I could go on but you get the point?
What the **** is this editorial about?? I know I had a point to make…comics…toilet pap—ah!
Yes, we should set aside 6th June as “Death of the British Comics Industry Day” and we should give each other sheets of toilet paper with, maybe, a matchstick man on? It’s a thought and I think an appropriate one -people giving each other sheets of toilet paper…on..my…birthday. Uh, maybe another day?
And to you “large” comickers: unless you want to attend comic cosplay events as Herbie The Fat Fury, The Human Blimp, Blimp Man, The Blob or some other out-sized comic character, get healthy. Remember: No Man’s Comic Collection Should Outlive Him.
AND NOW FOR A WORD FROM OUR SPONSOR -A CROSS BEARDY MAN DOING A TOTAL SELF PROMOTION!
Note:Yes, I do understand that there are certain medical conditions that affect a persons weight but I’m referring to the “I’ve big bones” folk (there is no such thing!). And, yes, I realise that diabetes is “a bloody serious thing” so the trendy “Some of my best friends are diabetics” folk can go **** off.
Oh, I thinbk the beardy guy was a Mexican named “Jesus”?
****************************************************************************************
Disclaimer:Comic Bits Online and Black Tower Comics & Books would like to point out that the opinions expressed here are those of the individual and in no way reflect the official opinion of CBO or BTCG.
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